We've been thinking and discussing this a lot over the years, but have never really settled on anything firm. You see, we're a blended family, with kids spending some time here, some time there, and a lot in between. My three are here throughout the school year and during the summer. Brian's three are here every other weekend and six weeks in the summer.
With that constantly changing dynamic, it has been difficult to balance exactly what would be fair. They don't have the same opportunities to do the same amount of chores, but that is through no fault of their own. I never felt it was fair for the allowance opportunity to be so lop-sided, so we've just avoided it all together. However, I think we have a new solution.
In our home, daily chores are an expected contribution of able-bodied human beings living in this household. I feel that paying the children to do daily chores makes it an option, and for us, things like taking out the trash, making beds, or emptying the dishwasher are just not options to be left undone. There are not enough hours in the day for Brian and I to do everything involved in keeping this household managed AND have any fun in the process. Therefore the kids have a few small regular responsibilities that have not been compensated for in the past, and will continue to be done that way. You may call it slave labor; we call it family.
That doesn't mean, however, that we don't think that the children should not learn about all things financial as part of their upbringing as well. Here is where that magical term, "allowance" comes in. As I thought about it, read about it, asked other parents about it, and prayed about it, I realized that it should be just what the word implies:
"Allowance: N. An amount or share allotted or granted."
That's right! It's something given -- not earned, not stipulated to, not tied to any responsibilities, really. I have hesitated in instituting free money for children earned from simply being so danged cute. I mean, who wants to raise entitled little heathens anyway?? But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I am doing the kids a disservice by NOT giving them allowance. I'm not teaching them the value of THINGS or MONEY. We provide everything they need, and sometimes fuss at them for being wasteful or non-appreciative. But really, if they never have to use actual money to buy things for themselves, how could they really ever know and understand the value of the things we provide? And if they don't learn to track their spending now, will they ever learn it as an adult? I know I still struggle to this day with tracking and budgeting.
So here's the plan, Stan!
Brian and I are going to commit to each other and the kids to track our income and expenses alongside the kids. We are going to use the super-fantabulous budgeting software, You Need A Budget, or YNAB for short. I have been working on setting up our budget off and on today, and will have it ready for our Family Meeting when we get all the kids here for the summer. We will show them a very brief overview of how it works, and how it implements the teachings of my favorite financial guru, Dave Ramsey. We will talk about household contributions expected from all members, even asking the kids for feedback. And we'll end the whole shindig with cold, hard cash and an individualized register for each child. The only catch is this: present your balanced register at the next family meeting in order to get your next allowance allotment. We will have to tweak whether this is truly done on a monthly or bi-weekly basis, so stay tuned.
For now, we have decided to start giving allowance out once per month, allotting one George Washington per year of age, per child. I'm willing to bet that the 7-year-old might feel slightly short-changed, but I will eagerly remind him of the extras he can do to earn some more cash!
That's where these super-nifty chore jars will come in handy! Each person will get their own personal daily responsibility jar, but there will also be a community chore jar with optional PAYING chores listed on those sticks. After that chore is done, they exchange that stick for some more $$. Brian or I will just verify that said chore is truly completed before paying out the cash from the CASH jar.
I'm really happy with how all of this is seeming to come together. Receiving pay for expected duties of family members is gone, and even the likelihood of brotherly or sisterly theft is lessened with the institution of the register. (We have had a problem with dollars disappearing on pool days last summer). I also think the temptation of theft is lessened when each kid knows when they're next payday will be. I'm excited to see how this goes.
Links to my inspiration of the day:
http://www.ducksinarowblog.com/2011/09/allowance-macdougall-family-style.html
http://athomewiththehinsons.blogspot.com/2010/06/chore-jars.html
http://moneysavingmom.com/downloads/household-management-forms
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