mental state of mind

I'm working really hard on finding that mental state of not hating my body, or striving for perfection.  I just really want to treat my body well so that it will allow me to do the things that make me happy inside. 

I've been a yo-yo dieter all of my adult life.  I lose some; I gain some.  Welcome to America, right?  To motherhoood?  Whatever it is, I'm pretty sure I'm over it.  I'm the heaviest I've ever been, I look like my mom more and more every day, and I'm really trying not to care so much about what I see through my distorted mind's eye. 

That doesn't mean that I want to gorge myself on fast food and mass-produced crap in a sack.  It just means that I need to focus on DOING, not seeing.  I need to focus on goals and rewards that have less to do with dress size and more to do with how I feel.

I love running.  I really do.  I love the alone time, the challenge of seeing how far my body can take me, the glance at nature around me, the good feeling I get from knowing my dog is well exercised, and the time to jam out to whatever music floats my boat at the time.  I love the thrill of a large road race, and setting goals and reaching new personal bests.  I LOVE new running shoes.  :)  I love sunshine and fresh air and...   and I just love running. 

I also love dancing.  And I love the mountains, and hiking, and singing, and swimming, and laughing, and feeling strong. 

I love time with my husband and with my kids... and sometimes even other people's kids.  I love being active and traveling and experiencing new things.  I like exploring. 

There are so many ACTIVE things I like, and if I work my body out in ways that I like in preperation for things that I like doing, then I shouldn't worry so much about what the shell looks like, right?  But after moving around that much and eating well, I should shrink into a size that more adequately reflects my active lifestyle. 

At least that's the approach I'm trying THIS TIME....